To Seek Help of Other than Allaah is Shirk

Allaah subhanahu wa ta'ala said:

"Do not call onto any beings other than Allaah. These are capable of neither benefiti nor harm. To do so is therefore guilty of wrongdoing. When Allaah inverts you with an affliction, none can remove it except Him." (Qur'aan 10:106-107)

"Seek your livelihood from Him and worship Him alone." (Qur'aan 29:17)

"Who I smore foolish than he who prays to other beings than Allaah, to beings who are ever impotent to answer his prayer?" (Qur'aan 46:5)

"Is He not Allaah Who answers the appeal of the needy when he calls upon Him and removes the deed?" (Qur'aan 27:62)

At-Tabarani reported, with respective isnad: At the time of the Prophet there was a hypocrite who rendered so much harm to the believers that some of them summoned the others to seek the help of the Prophet against him. When the Prophet sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam heard of it, he said, 'No man may seek my help. Only the help of Allaah is worthy of being sought.'

Issues addresses in this chapter:

1. Adding prayers for the specific purposes to the general prayer of recoursing for help is like adding the particular to the general

2. Explanation of the verse, "Do not call onto any beings other than Allaah. These are capable of neither benefit nor harm." (Qur'aan 10:106)

3. To do this is the greatest shirk

4. To this by even the most righteous and for totally altruistic purposes is nonetheless an act of wrong-doing

5. Explanation of the verse that follows [viz. "When Allaah invests you with an affliction." (Qur'aan 10:107)]

6. That, in addition to being blasphemous, recoursing to other than Allaah will not avail in this world

7. Explanation of the third verse [viz. "Seek your livelihood from Him." (Qur'aan 29:17)]

8. Prayer for livelihood may never be addressed to anyone besides Allaah. Similarly prayer for paradise

9. Explanation of the fourth verse [viz. "Who is more foolish." (Qur'aan 46:5)]

10. That nobody is more astray than he who recourses to other than Allaah

11. That the called is ignorant of the prayer of the caller

12. Such prayer even causes hatred to develop between the caller and the called

13. Calling to anyone is a kind of worship of the person called

14. Blasphemy of such worship

15. All these matters make the calling person the most foolish of all

16. Explanation of the fifth verse [viz. "Who answers the appeal of the needy." (Qur'aan 27:62)]

17. The really amazing fact is that idolaters do admit that none responds to the needy except Allaah; and for this reason; they too call on Him sincerely when they are in distress

18. The Prophet's protection of tawhid and discipline before Allaah.

[Sadly in this day and age there are many who call upon those other than Allaah. For anyone living in the Indian sub continent it becomes apparent that there is much grave worshipping - supposedly under the name of Islam. When a person goes to visit a dead person, often someone who is considered more pious than they are, and ask them for something or to approach Allaah on their behalf, they commit some degree ofshirk, for it is Allaah subhanahu wa ta'ala alone who has the ability to listen and respond to prayers - and He subhanahu wa ta'ala does as He subhanahu wa ta'ala wills, and may He subhanahu wa ta'ala make things easy for all, ameen.

In the words of Hud alayhis-salaam the messenger to the people of Ad : "I put my trust in Allaah my Lord and your Lord! There is not a moving creature but He hath grasp of its forelock. Verily it is my Lord that is on a Straight Path." (Qur'aan 11:56). Therefore our trust and our intentions and our actions should be to Allaah subhanahu wa ta'ala alone.

I was wondering about why any of us do good deeds. Some say that we do them to please others, e.g. I help a friend with some work in class. Others give other reasons, and Allaah subhanahu wa ta'ala knows best. But when I considered this, and thought about it, effectively what any of us should be doing, whether it is kindness to a partner, to a friend, family member whoever, we do these things, to please Allaah. To me the wise person is the one who recognizes this, and whenever they act they do not do it for themselves, or to show of - so it could be said of them - rather they do it because this life is in essence a worship of Allaah subhanahu wa ta'ala and part of worshipping Allaah subhanahu wa ta'ala is to keep good relations, and to help one another in whatever way we are able.

The greatest task however is that of pride and arrogance, that all of us face. Usually when we help someone, we feel good for doing it. That in itself is a very powerful rewards, however none of us should become big headed, and we should always remember that everything that we do do in this world should be as a preparation for the hereafter. And there is no better way to navigate this world that by remembering our Creator and attempting to live our lives as best we can in accordance to the laws He subhanahu wa ta'ala ordained for us, and may Allaah subhanahu wa ta'ala make it easy for us all.

There are a couple of duas that are important for us:

O Ever Living, O Self Sustaining, by Your mercy I call for help. Set right my affairs completely and do not entrust me to myself even for the wink of an eye - Ya haiyul ya kaiyumu birahmatika astaghithu us lili shanikulahu walatuklini ilainafsi tarfaha ain

O Allaah make sufficient for me what you have made lawful so that I may avoid that which is unlawful. And make me self sufficient by your favour, free from need of anyone but you. - Alla humak fee nee bi halaali ka un haraamika wa ag nee nee bi faz li kaummun siwa ka

In both of the above examples, we are seeking refuge in Allaah subhanahu wa ta'ala, we are asking Allaah subhanahu wa ta'ala to have mercy upon us, and we are asking Allaah subhanahu wa ta'ala to guide us, and provide for us. And surely as written in the following: "O ye who believe! when ye meet a force be firm and call Allaah in remembrance much (and often); that ye may prosper." Qur'aan 8:45 "Say: 'He is my Lord! There is no god but He! On Him is my trust and to Him do I turn!' " Qur'aan 13:30]

Duties of a Muslim towards a non-Muslim

What is the duty of a Muslim towards a non-Muslim, whether he is a dhimmi in a Muslim country or in his own country, and the Muslim is living in the land of that non-Muslim? The duty I would like to have clarified is interactions of all kinds, starting with greeting and ending with celebrating the non-Muslim’s festivals with him. Is it permissible to take him as a friend at work only? Please advise us, may Allah reward you.

Ans:

Praise be to Allaah. The duty of the Muslim towards a non-Muslim includes a number of things:

Firstly:

Da‘wah or calling him to Allah, may He be glorified and exalted. He should call him to Allah and explain to him the reality of Islam when possible, with regard to whatever issues he has knowledge about, because this is the greatest kindness that he can give to his fellow-citizens and to those whom he meets of Jews, Christians and others who may be mushrikeen (polytheists), because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:

“The one who guides others to goodness will have a reward like that of the one who does it.”

And he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said to ‘Ali (may Allah be pleased with him),when he sent him to Khaybar and instructed him to call the Jews to Islam:

“By Allah, if Allah were to guide one man through you, that would be better for you than having red camels (the best kind).”

And he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:

“Whoever calls others to right guidance will have a reward like that of those who follow him, without that detracting from their reward in the slightest.”

So calling him (the non-Muslim) to Islam, conveying Islam to him and being sincere towards him in that are among the best means of drawing close to Allah.

Secondly:

He should not wrong him, with regard to his physical wellbeing, his wealth or his honour. If he is a dhimmi (non-Muslim living under Muslim rule), musta’man (one who is granted security in a Muslim land) or mu‘aahid (one with whose country the Muslims have a peace deal), then he should give him his due rights, and not transgress against his wealth by stealing, betraying or deceiving, and he should not harm him physically by striking or killing him, because the fact that he is a mu‘aahid or dhimmi, or musta’man, means that he is protected by sharee‘ah.

Thirdly:

There is no reason why we should not interact with him, buying, selling, renting, hiring and so on. It is narrated in saheeh reports that the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) bought from kuffaar who were idol worshippers, and he bought from the Jews, and these are interactions. When he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) died, his shield was being held in pledge by a Jew for some food he had bought for his family (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him).

Fourthly:

With regard to greeting, the Muslim should not initiate the greeting, but he may return it, because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:

“Do not initiate the greeting of salaam with the Jews or Christians.”

And he (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:

“If the people of the Book greet you with salaam (by saying al-salaamu ‘alaykum), say ‘Wa ‘alaykum.’”

So the Muslim should not initiate the greeting to a kaafir, but if the kaafir initiates it, and the Jew or Christians etc. greets you with salaam, then you should say “wa ‘alaykum,” as the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said.

These are some of the rights between a Muslim and a kaafir.

Another right is being a good neighbour. So if he is a neighbour, be kind to him and do not annoy him; give charity to him if he is poor, give him gifts, give him beneficial advice, because these are things that will attract him to Islam and to become Muslim; and because the neighbour has rights. The Messenger (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:

“Jibreel kept urging me to be kind to my neighbour until I thought that he would make him my heir.” Saheeh - agreed upon.

If the neighbour is a kaafir, he still has the rights of a neighbour; if he is both a relative and a kaafir, then he has two rights: the rights of a neighbour and the rights of a relative. One of the rights of the neighbour is that you should give him charity, but not zakaah, if he is poor, because Allah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Allaah does not forbid you to deal justly and kindly with those who fought not against you on account of religion nor drove you out of your homes. Verily, Allaah loves those who deal with equity” [al-Mumtahanah 60:8].

According to the saheeh hadeeth narrated from Asma’ bint Abi Bakr (may Allah be pleased with her), her mother, who was a mushrik, entered upon her during the truce between the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) and the people of Makkah, seeking help. Asma’ asked the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) for permission - should she uphold ties of kinship with her? The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:

“Uphold ties of kinship with her.”

But with regard to celebrating their festivals, the Muslim should not take part in celebrating their festivals, but there is nothing wrong with offering them condolences if a loved one dies, such as saying “May Allah compensate you in your loss” and other kind words. But he should not say “May Allah forgive him” or “May Allah have mercy on him” if the deceased was a kaafir, and he should not pray for the deceased if he was a kaafir. But he may pray for the one who is alive to be guided and to be compensated and so on.

End quote. Shaykh ‘Abd al-‘Azeez ibn Baaz (may Allah have mercy on him). Fataawa Noor ‘ala al-Darb, 1/289-291.

A Husband's Duties towards his Wife

Few days back, I posted an Article titled, “A Woman's Duties towards her Husband” and in response to that, I received many requests for posting the duties of Husbands towards their Wives as well. This article is in the continuance to what I posted earlier. Hope the readers will appreciate.

A Husband's Duties towards his Wife

Almighty Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala has prescribed certain rights of the husband towards their wives. The Holy Qur’an says: “The women have almost the same rights over men as men have certain rights over the women in kindness.”

Beloved Prophet SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has said: “Best among you are those who behave well with their women.”

The Prophet of Allah SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has also said: “I make a Will to you about the women, so obey my will.”

In another Hadith, the Beloved Habeeb SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam is reported to have said: “No believing man should have enmity and hatred against a believing woman. If he dislikes certain habits of that woman, there would certainly be some virtues in her too.”

The Hadith means that the woman must be having both good and bad habits. Man should not always point out her bad habits only. He should also appreciate her good habits.

The Rights of the Wife

There are certain obligations that men owe to the women and these obligations should be fully appreciated.

1. Every husband has the obligation to provide for the sustenance of his wife. She should be provided with adequate food, a comfortable home, suitable clothes and other basic amenities of life. He should always bear in mind that this woman has disassociated herself from her parents, brothers and sisters, relatives and friends and has joined him to share all the ups and downs of life. Hence, it has become his duty to look after her basic needs and comforts.

2. It should be remembered that husbands, who never bother for the sustenance of their wives, commit a severe crime of depriving Allah’s SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala creatures of their rights. Such people would be dealt with severely in the Court of Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala. The Holy Qur’an says: “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means.” [4:34]

3. The husband should satisfy his wife’s physical needs. The Sharee’ah has not prescribed any limit for this. But, he has to ensure that woman’s minimum sexual requirements are met so that she may not commit a sin by eyeing other men in order to quench her thirst. There are certain men who, after marriage, do not take care of the sexual needs of their wives. Such people are great sinners and will be severely convicted in the Court of Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala. Almighty Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala has granted women the right to conjugal relations with their husbands. The importance of this right can be well understood by the following example of Ameer al-Mo’mineen Sayyiduna Umar al-Farooq Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho. It is reported that he was on his routine inspection round at night in Madinatul Munawwara when he heard an old lady moaning and reciting melancholic couplets. The Caliph Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho stopped there and listened to the wailing lady. He Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho investigated the matter and came to know that the husband of the woman had gone for Jihad long time ago and this woman has been remembering her husband with these sad couplets. The Ameer Radi ALLAHu Ta'ala Anho was deeply moved and immediately issued an official Decree to all chiefs of his army that no married man should be away from his wife for more than four months.

4. The husband should not beat up his wife without her committing a most severe crime. The Messenger of Allah SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has said: “Nobody should beat up his wife as he does beat up his slave. He should make love with her later some time.”

However, if the woman commits a bigger crime, the husband can beat her not in vengeance but with the intention of reforming her and as a warning.  While beating, he should take care that she should not be hurt seriously. The Books of Fiqha have mentioned that the husband can punish his wife for four things:

a. If the husband orders his wife to decorate herself with ornaments and legitimate make-up but she disobeys and remains dirty.
b. If the husband invites her to bed and she refuses without any legitimate reason.
c. If she does not take bath to purify herself after menses.
d. If she abstain from performing Salaah without a legitimate reason.

In the above circumstances, the husband should first persuade the wife. If she does not agree to comply with his requests, he may threaten her. If she still does not obey him, he can beat her barring her face. He should not beat her so severely to the extent of a fracture or a severe wound.

5. In order to bring peace and prosperity in the married life, both the wife and the husband should take care of each other’s sentiments and emotions. The anger of husband brings to the wife nothing but tension, depression and confusion. Similarly, the anger of the wife brings to the husband nothing but disappointment, mental torture, frustration and bitterness. It is, therefore, advisable to both husband and wife to be patient and compassionate in their dealings.

6. The husband should never appreciate the beauty and other merits of strange woman in front of his wife. This may lead to create jealousy and suspicion in the mind of his wife. She would think that her husband has some illicit relations with that woman. This thought is a poison that kills matrimonial relations. If a man cannot tolerate that his wife should wrongly be associated with another man, the wife also cannot tolerate another woman to share her husband. The woman cannot listen to praise and admiration of another woman through the lips of her husband even if that another woman happens to be his mother or sister or some other close relative.

7. Man is, undoubtedly, made a ruler over the woman but it does not mean that he should ask her to do a work, which is beyond her capacity, or a work which she would not like to do. If the husband still insists his wife to do the work against her will, she would accomplish that job unwillingly and this would create a sort of disgust against her husband, which would ultimately mar their matrimonial life.

8. The husband should from time to time censure the life style of his wife - sometimes in a harsh tone, sometimes with love and affection and sometimes with persuasion. There are husbands who always keep a rod hanging with their moustaches and never treat their wives in a good manner other than rebuking and beating them. Such wives get frustrated and start hating their husbands. There are other hen-pecked husbands who over-pamper their wives even after they commit severe blunders. Their wives become stubborn and outspoken.

9. The husband should implement this couplet of Sa’di of Shiraz in their life. He says: “Strictness and pampering are very good things but at appropriate times”. For example, the surgeon cuts open the wound but at the same time apply soothing ointment. Likewise, the husband should not be very strict nor very soft. A middle path always brings good results.

10. The husband, while setting out on a tour, should go to his wife and informally seek her consent in a loving manner and as a matter of goodwill. He may ask her to invoke the Almighty Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala that the journey may prove safe and beneficial for him. Similarly, while returning from the tour he should bring some exclusive gifts for her. This gesture would encourage the wife to think with satisfaction that my husband loves me to the extent that even if he was away engaged in his business activities, he remembered me. Thus, a simple initiative on the part of the husband will win over the heart of his wife.

11. If the woman brings anything from her father’s house or prepares herself and presents it to the husband, he should express gratitude and appreciate it. This will please her. The husband should never reject or discard or criticize any gift offered by his wife.

12. If the wife falls sick, the husband should dedicatedly look after her. He should take extra pain in her nursing, feeding, etc. This little service will win over the heart of the wife and she will be very grateful to the husband.

13. The husband should express his full confidence and trust in his wife and, to prove this, he should hand over the domain of the house to her so that she may feel dignified and involved. The Holy Prophet of Islam SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has said that the woman is the guardian and caretaker of her husband’s house and Almighty Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala will take an account from her in this regard on the Day of Judgement.

14. The very benefit of relying on the wife would be that she would feel herself responsible for a vital department in the set up of the household. This will give the husband an opportunity to freely think of other things regarding the promotion and progress of his business.

15. The husband should never share the secrets of her wife with others. Sayyiduna Rasoolullah SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has said: “Worst is the person in the sight of Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala who goes to his wife and then discloses her secrets and lowers her status in the eyes of others”. 

16. The husband should be neat and clean as he expects the same from his wife. He should look smart, dynamic and a loveable person.

17. The husband should provide her with the paraphernalia of personal hygiene such as soap, hair oil, comb, Mehndi, perfumes, etc.  so that the wife may keep herself neat and clean and in better looks.

18. The husband should not level charges of corrupt practices against his wife without going into the depth of the matter. The relationship between a husband and a wife is based purely on mutual understanding. They have to trust each other. Any baseless suspicion against each other would mar the relations of the husband and wife.  A Hadith says: “One Bedouin came to the court of the Holy Prophet SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam and said, ‘O Allah’s Apostle SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam, my wife has delivered a child who is dark complexioned and does not resemble me. I am sure it is not my child’. The Holy Prophet SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam said, ‘Do you have some camels?’ He said, ‘Yes, I have many camels’.  The Holy Prophet SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam asked, ‘What is the colour of those camels?’ He said, ‘They are brown’. The Prophet of Islam SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam asked, ‘Are there some grey camels among them?’ He said, ‘Yes, a few of them are grey’. The Prophet SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam said, ‘Tell me how those brown camels gave birth to these grey camels?’ He said, ‘Some camel among the ancestors of my brown camels would have been of grey colour and these grey camels might have taken their origin from that particular camel.’ The Holy Prophet SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam said, ‘Similarly, it is possible that anyone among your ancestors would have been of black complexion and your child might have inherited his genetic influence.’”

19. If there is some difference of opinion between the husband and wife, the husband should not make a hurry to pronounce divorce to her.  He should exercise restraint. After his anger subsides, he should ponder over the entire matter with a cool mind. He may seek the advice of his elders in this matter and decide whether or not there is a chance of reconciliation and settlement. If a point of understanding and reconciliation emerges, he should act accordingly and refrain from breaking the wedlock. The Beloved Habeeb SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has said that the divorce is the most disliked things among the permissible things in the sight of Almighty Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala.

20. If both husband and wife feel that there is no way out except the separation, the husband should pronounce one Talaaq after the woman clears her menses.  There will be a temporary separation between them. This period will give them enough time to review their decision of separation. If they think that reconciliation is in their interest, the husband should take his wife back in his arms and forget what had happened between them.  But if they think that they can no more live together, the husband should pronounce the second Talaaq after she clears her menses. The second pronouncement separates both of them. They have still a time to think of reconciliation. If they decide to live together, they have to perform the Nikah afresh after the period of Iddat is over. If they do not go for any reconciliation till the completion of the Iddat period, the third Talaaq will automatically come into force bringing a permanent separation between them. They cannot enter wedlock unless they go for Halalah. Halalah means that the woman should marry another man and have physical intercourse with him. The husband number two should divorce her. After the completion of the period of Iddat, she can marry the husband number one again.

21. There are some ignorant persons who play with the word Talaaq. They pronounce the divorce over minor clashes with their wives. After the pronouncement of divorce they repent and rush to the theologians and Muftis and force them to give a verdict in their favour. Some persons, while approaching the theologians, tell a lie that they had pronounced only one Talaaq. The Mufti has to allow them to retain their wives according to the Law of Sharee’ah. Thus, these ignorant people get themselves involved in establishing relations with a woman who is otherwise not to be taken as wife without Halalah.

22. If a man possesses more than one wife, it is obligatory on him to do justice with them. There should be equal treatment among wives in respect of sustenance, living conditions and personal attention. He has to spend equal time with every one of them. The Holy Prophet SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has said that if a man has two wives and does not treat them equally, he would be raised on the Day of Judgment with half his body paralysed. 

23. If the husband faces some trouble because of the misbehaviour of his wife, he should try to avoid her and keep patience. Woman’s arrogance and foolishness is a natural phenomenon. The Glorious Prophet of Islam SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has said: “Woman has been created from the bent rib of Adam Alaihis Salam. If somebody tries to make the bent bone straight, it will rather break instead of becoming straight”. Similarly, if someone tries to set his wife right, there will be more a chance of separation instead of improvement in her nature.

24. The husband should not behave as a miser in meeting the materialistic requirements of his wife nor should he go for extravagance in her maintenance. He should define his expenditure as per his capacity.

25. The husband should not confine his wife within the four walls of his house. She should be taken to her parents and relatives from time to time provided these visits do not bring any trouble to the peace of his house.

A Woman's Duties towards her Husband

A Woman's Duties towards her Husband

All Praise is due to Allah, Lord of the worlds, our Cherisher and Sustainer. All praise is due to Allah, who created spouses for us from ourselves to gain rest and kept love and mercy between the Husbands and the Wives. Countless Durood and Salaams be upon the most perfect and unique of creation, our Leader, our Master, the Beloved of Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala Muhammad Mustafa SallAllahu Ta'ala Alaihi wa ala Aalihi wa SaHbihi wa Baaraka wa Sallam.

The Holy Qur’an says: “…So the righteous women are obedient [to Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala and submissive to their husbands], and guard in [the husband’s] absence what Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala would have them guard [i.e., their chastity and the prestige and property of the husband]…” [4: 34]

As a wife, side by side with enjoying equal fundamental human rights, a woman has been placed one degree below the husband in the matter of administering the affairs of the family. The Qur’an says: “…but men have a degree [of advantage] over them…” [2:228]

Compare this with the following verdicts of the exponents of modern scientific thought on this problem.

Says Nemilov: “Man, perhaps even down to the protein molecules of his tissue cells, is biologically different from woman. From the very moment of sex formation in the embryo, the biological ducting of the sexes develops along entirely divergent paths … We must recognize the unquestionable existence of the biological inequality of the sexes. It goes deeper and is of far greater import than it would appear to those not familiar with natural science.”

“The desires and conduct of the two sexes”, says Mercier, “are not similar but are complementary and reciprocal. In courtship the male is active: his role is to court, to pursue, to possess, to control, to protect, to love. The role of a female is passive … Consequent on this fundamental difference are certain others. For pursuit, greater ardour is necessary than for mere reception; and the courting activity of the male is, throughout the whole animal kingdom, more ardent than that of the female; and this greater ardour is connected with certain other differences.” .

Julian Huxley observes: “I venture to prophesy not only that the inherent differences between the sexes will not tend to diminish in the course of evolution but that man will continue, as now and in the past, to emphasize them by custom and convention.” 

It should, however, be clearly kept in mind that, in the Qur’anic teaching, the husband and the wife stand in complementary relation to each other, and never in the relation of the ruler and the ruled. The Qur’an enjoins upon men: “They [women] are your garments and you are their garments….” [2:187]

In the presence of the husband, the Holy Qur’an has not chosen her to function as the head of the family, because owing to his masculine constitution and appropriate mental make-up, the husband is better equipped to earn livelihood for the family, to bear the physical strains, and to avert dangers to the family in general. The Holy Qur’an refers to these functions of the husband when, speaking of his role for the wife. It says: “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala has given the one more [strength] than the other, and because they spend of their wealth [for supporting them and other members of the family]…” [4: 34]

Of course, the husband has to administer the family jointly with the wife, according to the Qur’anic Law: “…[Believers are those] who conduct their affairs by mutual consultation [and not arbitrarily]…” [42: 38]

As a follower of the Qur’an, it is only in extreme cases that the husband may differ irreconcilably with the wife. But, then too, he cannot transgress the bounds of justice and mercy of the Holy Qur’an, which commands him to be always just, merciful and considerate.

The second position of the wife as administrator is, thus, not a source of suffering for her but a source of strength and a blessing.

Every woman must obey the legitimate commands of her husband. Appeasement of husband is a great virtue while the displeasure of the husband carries heavy prosecution. The Holy Prophet of Islam SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has said: “If I were to command humans to prostrate before anyone other than Allah SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala, I would have commanded the women to bow down before their husbands.”

The Messenger of Allah SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has also said: “If a woman dies in a state that her husband is happy with her, she would enter the Paradise”.

The Glorious Prophet SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam has also said: “When the husband calls his wife for some work, she should immediately attend his call even if she may be sitting by the side of her hearth [for cooking]”.  The Hadith means that the wife should give top priority to attend to her husband.

Another Hadith says: “If a husband says to his wife to transform a yellow mountain into a black one or turn a black mountain into a white one, she should obey his orders”.  The Hadith means that the woman should try to perform the hardest of the hard job assigned by her husband.

The Holy Prophet SallAllaho Alaihi wa Sallam said: “Allah’s SubHanuhu wa Ta'ala Angels curse the woman throughout the night whose husband calls her to bed but she refuses and the husband goes to sleep in anger”.

Relations between husband and wife have been conceived as based on mutual cooperation, love and compassion. The Holy Qur’an says: “And among His Signs is this that He created your mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your [hearts]; verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.” [30: 21]

It means that : -

• Marriage is essentially a spiritual bond of union, rather than a mere physical relationship;
• Marriage should be contracted with the firm resolve of maintaining the relation for life;
• Monogamy should be ideal, because that is the ideal condition in which mutual cooperation, the common man can practice harmony and love normally and smoothly.

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The Ease and Simplicity of Islam

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Before I begin, I would like to make a disclaimer that this article deals with the actual laws of Islam, showing that Islam is a simple religion and not burdensome, this does not meanthat life will be easy for a practicing Muslim as Allah has promised to test each and every one of us. So keep in mind that although Islam is easy to practice if you commit yourself, your level of commitment will be tested by Allah. 

• There is a misunderstanding amongst many people that Islam is difficult and a burden to follow. Such people either have an incorrect understanding of Islam or do not realize how easy the rules of Islam are to follow. Let us look at the basic teachings of Islam and see how simple, natural and easy it is to practice Islam. 
  The scholars of Islam have agreed that the general principle regarding things of this world is that everything is permissible unless proven otherwise. So the burden of proof actually falls on those who say that anything is prohibited. This applies to all worldly things, as for religious deeds, the deed must be proven or it will be considered an innovation. Proof for this principle can be found in the following verses,
  
  
  “Allah wishes to make things easy for you, and not to make things difficult for you,� [Surah Baqarah 2:185] and “We did not place difficulty in this religion.� [Surah Hajj 22:78]
   
• Also the following Hadith is proof of this principle: 
  
  “Religion is very easy and whoever overburdens himself in his religion will not be able to continue in that way. So you should not be extremists, but aim to be near to perfection and receive the good tidings that you will be rewarded; and gain strength by worshipping in the mornings and the nights.â€� [Saheeh Al-Bukhari 1:2:38]
  
  In fact, Imam Bukhari has a chapter in his Saheeh Al-Bukhari called “The chapter of the religion being easy� and ample proof for this point can be found in that chapter.
• Firstly, the fact that everything worldly is permissible unless prohibited by sacred texts or deduction from them, is proof that Islam is not a difficult religion to follow, the amount of things that are permissible to do are far more than the obligations or prohibitions.Islam is not an ascetic religion that expects people to abandon the world and worship Allah all day in a cave, in fact, Islam prohibits such behaviour and encourages us to interact with society and live normal lives within the boundaries set by Allah, fulfilling our rights to Allah, to ourselves, and to the rest of creation.
• Islam has given rights to all creation; we are not to harm any human, animal, plant or even ourselves unjustly. We must stay away from all sources of vice and whatever leads to them and we must fulfill our basic obligations. If we do these things, we can enjoy the permissible things of this world like family, spousal relations, physical sports or whatever you enjoy as long as you do not break the rules of Islam.
• Islam is the natural religion; it appeals to our inner nature (Fitrah) and fulfills its basic needs without asking us to do anything unnatural. Try and find one ruling in the Quran and Sunnah that goes against human nature, you will not find it.
• Islam is not a burden and does not ask us to do anything that we are incapable of doing, we are not required to give up our personalities, social lives or money. We are not required to pray all night or fast every day, in fact such things are prohibited. Islam emphasizes that we live a balanced life fulfilling our obligations to Allah as well as our obligations towards people and even our own selves. Try and find one command or prohibition in Islam that is beyond human ability, there is no such ruling.
• One reason many people find Islam difficult to practice is because Satan beautifies evil deeds and makes good deeds look boring and difficult, thus we becomes lazy. Yet if one overcomes this obstacle he will find that the deeds emphasized by Islam bring true inner peace and are not too difficult, and he will begin to see the evils and wastage involved in committing sins. Take that first step and see for yourself.
• Islam obliges us to worship Allah only, pray five times a day, fast one month a year, give two and a half percent of our excess wealth in charity, make Hajj once in our lifetime if possible and in general to be good to the rest of creation, stay away from the prohibited matters and have good character. None of these things are beyond human capabilities or unnatural, there is nothing prohibited that is necessary in our lives, rather only that which is harmful to human life is prohibited.
• Another important point to remember is that Allah is Ar-Rahman (Most Merciful) and Al-Ghafoor (Most Forgiving) which means that if we try our best to practice Islam, and still fall into error due to our human nature and own weakness, the door to Allah’s forgiveness is always open for those who repent.
• The basics of Islam are simple to understand and practical to implement, making Islam a universal religion that can be practiced by anyone regardless of his or her intellectual or physical capabilities. It is this pure simplicity of Islam that makes it so universally appealing and it is one of the many reasons that so many people around the world from different backgrounds convert to Islam.